Spy, Essex, 2016
Spy, Kent, 2016 • Orpington-based Spy recently alerted me to the fact that they have an updated phone number. I like their eye logo and have featured quite a few […]
City Security Holdings, Bristol: wrinkled
"City Security Holdings" burglar alarm, Bristol • I always thought this logo was a crescent moon, but have just realised it may also be half an eye and also a C monogram – multilayered! Sadly the labels on these City alarms haven't worn well, they all seem to end up wrinkled like this one. • Spotted: Broad Street, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol WestMicro-Vision, Stroud: throwback
"Micro-Vision Fire and Security" burglar alarm, Stroud • Maybe a throwback to the days when computers were called micros; or maybe just a claim to catch very small burglars. • Spotted: Threadneedle Street, Stroud, Gloucestershire, GL5, England, 2012 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of StroudSecurity Surveillance Ltd, Hackney: boom-box
"Security Surveillance Ltd" burglar alarm, Hackney • Finally, a couple of camera-based techy alarms. At least I think this is meant to be a camera, it looks more like an early 1990s boom-box, or some kind of radar gun. • Spotted: Nazrul Street, Hackney, London, E2, England, 2012 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Hackney South and ShoreditchAlarm Vision, Cardiff: spiky
"Alarm Vision" burglar alarm, Cardiff • This is great. I love the way the Welsh feel driven to put red dragons on everything – and how can you not like a tiny mythical creature poncing around in a spiky monogram-cum-waveform? • Spotted: Quay Street, Cardiff, South Glamorgan, CF10, Wales, 2012 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Cardiff CentralScan, Merton: bubble lettering
"Scan Alarms" burglar alarm, Merton • Dig that crazy bubble lettering – not the world's most sophisticated rendition of the concept of scanning, to be sure. • Spotted: Merton High Street, Merton, London, SW19, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Wimbledon“i2i Security”, Middlesbrough: geddit?
"i2i Security Middlesbrough" burglar alarm, Middlesbrough • There's only one eye so it's Eye 2 I, geddit? If it was Eye 2 Eye, they'd have had an eye on both Is. And if it was I 2 I, it would suggest serious undermanning. Or something. Found above a suitably poetic Lord Byron sign (see below). • Spotted: Bridge Street East, Middlesbrough, Cleveland, TS2, England, 2012 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Middlesbrough
“Pro-Guard”, Stroud: professionalism
"Pro-Guard Security Solutions Ltd" burglar alarm, Stroud • There are lots of guard alarms, but this starey-eyed sounder is the only one offering the added excellence of professionalism. If you wanted unprofessional guarding, maybe you'd hire a certain quadratic firm who messed up a bit during the Olympics, ha ha. • Spotted: Threadneedle Street, Stroud, Gloucestershire, GL5, England, 2012 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Stroud“ATA Systems”, Bristol: intricate
"ATA Systems Protegimus" burglar alarm, Bristol • Not sure if this is related to yesterday's ATA – the trestle-tabley monogram's quite similar, if somewhat ambiguous as to whether it says AA or ATA. The surrounds, however, are vastly more intricate: a heraldic array of shield, crossed swords, scary cyclops eye, what looks like a maltese cross poking out from behind, and all supported with a scroll bearing the Harry Potteresque declamation "Protegimus" (we protect). Leaving nothing to chance, then. • Spotted: Nova Scotia Place, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2013 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol West“Western”, Falmouth: staring eyes
"Western Security Systems We Watch Day and Night" burglar alarm, Falmouth • Not the most obvious time reference, but the roundel at the top states "we watch day and night". And to reinforce the point, there's a pair of staring eyes - one in the light, one in the dark. Nice! • Spotted: Market Strand, Falmouth, Cornwall, TR11, England, 2012 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Truro and Falmouth“Isis”, Oxford: posh
"Isis Security Systems" burglar alarm, Oxford • Oxford's other famous river is the Isis (a posh name for the Thames), which like the Cherwell gives its name to a long-running student magazine. Isis was also an Egyptian goddess, and this sounder piles on the references with the visual pun of a startled-looking eye. I reckon that's a CR logo underneath it, another brand that's common in the town. • Spotted: Cornmarket, Oxford, Oxfordshire, OX1, England, 2012 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Oxford East
Above: fops punting on the Thames, aka the Isis, at OxfordGhost under “ASG Vision”, Bristol: anagrams
Ghost under "ASG Vision (on OS Resolution)" burglar alarm, Bristol • Triple acronym whammy: ADG on OSR on something that was a flat-ended oval. Maybe one of these also-Bristolian APS jobbies? In which case the total initials are ADGOSRAPS, whose anagrams include Rap Ass Dog, Spar as God and Drag Soaps. Wow, deep. • Spotted: Broad Street, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol West“Watchman Alarms”, Edinburgh: not plural
"Watchman Alarms" burglar alarm, Edinburgh • Another waveform in a circle, like Guardwell the other day – only not as retro. Luckily the name isn't plural, so I don't have to go on about the also retro Watchmen graphic novels. • Spotted: Charlotte Square, Edinburgh, Scotland, EH2, 2012 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Edinburgh North and Leith“Watchguard Security”, Cambridge: deleted
"Watchguard Security" burglar alarm, Cambridge • Hmmm, they appear to have crossed out their own logo. Strange (and very basic). • Spotted: Castle Street, Cambridge, Cambridgeshire, CB3, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of South Cambridgeshire“Cox Security”, Beckenham: apple in Bowieland
"Cox Security" burglar alarm, Beckenham • Cox - it's an apple, geddit? To me, the logo also looks like a staring eye, which would make it a pun on "the apple of my eye" and thus also qualify it for the "vision" and "monograms" categories. I found a couple of Cox security firms on the internet: Cox Security Solutions Ltd near Milton Keynes, and the wonderfully-named CoxLocks in the Surrey area, which is nearer to Beckenham (which, pathetically, I always associate with David Bowie in his dress-wearing days). But neither has this logo, so it may be some completely different firm. • Spotted: High Street, Beckenham, Kent, BR3, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Beckenham
[caption id="attachment_11506" align="alignnone" width="472" caption="Left, David Bowie in Beckenham (and a dress); right, a cox apple"]
[/caption]“Crime Cure”, Bristol: vintage inverted pocket
"Crime Cure" burglar alarm, Bristol • This is an absolutely classic sounder, and it makes me chuckle every time I see it. I found it at eye level in downown Bristol, the city that never stops giving great burglar alarm gifts. Everything about it, from my shallow design-based point of view, is good: it's vintage metal; an unusual "inverted pocket" shape (though I have found one other); rare use of green; amusing name in bold modernist type; and a complex piece of heraldry incorporating eight popular security tropes in a tiny space, namely lions, keys, an eye, a padlock, some bars, a shield, a castle, and even a motto – "protect and deter". An internet search on "crime cure security" throws up firms in business listings all over the place, including Bristol, but as none have their own websites I'm assuming they're all defunct.• Spotted: High Street, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol West“ICU”, Hackney: hip heptagon
"ICU" burglar alarm, Hackney • My final vision-themed "backronym" offers up the unambiguous message "I see you". It's a nice idea, although the label could equally well be a piece of conceptual street art. Note that the sounder is the first I've posted with seven equal sides – a shape known occasionally as a septagon, but more usually as a heptagon. Or in this case, a hip Hackney heptagon. Fact: its sides all meet at an angle of 128.5714286 degrees. Thank you, Wikipedia! • Spotted: Rivington Street, Hackney, London, EC2, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Hackney South and Shoreditch
“MECE”, Camden: see me
"MECE" burglar alarm, Camden • Assuming this firm isn't run by an ecstasy-chugging rapper called MC EE, the logo is intended to read "me see" – geddit? – and is thus, like yesterday's iC, a "backronym". What the letters actually stand for isn't indicated on MECE's website, though I did learn that it's a huge 18-year-old company with offices across Europe, and loads of major clients including Eurotunnel, Cambridge University and the 2012 Olympics. Which makes it odd that I've only ever come across a couple of their sounders. • Spotted: Store Street, Camden, London, WC1, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Holborn and St Pancras
“IC Integrated Security Ltd”, Southwark: backronym
"IC Integrated Security Ltd" burglar alarm, Southwark • To end this vision theme, a few examples of punning abbreviations, where the characters stand for entire words or syllables. While broadly acronyms, these seem to be a grey area in the English language, with no precise term for the multifarious kinds of letter-play available, though in an extensive entry, fascinating to those of a sub-editorial bent, Wikipedia suggests "initialism" as a catch-all term. I suspect this is what they would cutely sub-class a "backronym" – "one deliberately designed to be especially apt for the thing being named" – as Integrated Security happily reduces to iC, reading as "I see", or even "eye see". Had the designer dotted the "i" with an eye, this would have created enough levels of punning to end the universe. It possibly did end the company, because their website was last updated in 2009. • Spotted: Old Jamaica Road, Southwark, London, SE16, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bermondsey and Old Southwark
“CamWatch”, Sheffield: prayer pomegranate
"CamWatch" burglar alarm, Sheffield • Ah, the modern world – up until now eyes have been watching from the vision-themed burglar alarms, but today it's a camera. However, there may be observation from a higher power still, for this is situated on Sheffield's Old Synagogue, a striking Victorian Gothic building rearing up from a narrow side-street near the cathedral. My photo of the frontage (below) doesn't really do it justice; it's carved with Hebrew inscriptions and topped with a stone pomegranate, whose 613 seeds represent the number of laws in the first five books of the Bible. By the 1950s it had become a warehouse for the woollen trade and later a hairdressing supplier, and is now restored as office space. There's a bit more info about its warehouse days half way down this rambling discussion thread, and an article on Sheffield's symbolically carved buildings – including the pomegranate – here. • Spotted: North Church Street, Sheffield, South Yorkshire, S1, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Sheffield Central
“ExtraWatch Security Systems”, Islington: which witch
"ExtraWatch Security Systems" burglar alarm, Islington • From the land of Arsenal and Old Labour (by which I mean long-serving MP Jeremy Corbyn, not ex-resident Tony Blair) comes this mouldering, faded and defunct-looking item bearing the colours of both; draw from that what parallels you will. So bleached is it that at first I thought it said Extra Witch, which sounds much more interesting and conjures up (ha ha) images of a bevy of broomstick-riding harridans swooping down upon Islington's cowering malefactors. Including, hopefully, Tony Blair. • Spotted: Marlborough Road, Islington, London, N19, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Islington North
“Sight Sound & Security Systems”, Glasgow: free mould
"Sight Sound & Security Systems" burglar alarm, Glasgow • Sight, sound, security and a free helping of damp black mould – you can't argue with that! • Spotted: Merchant City area, Glasgow, Lanarkshire, G1, Scotland, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Glasgow Central
“ASG Vision”, Bristol: flamboyant tail
"ASG Vision" (over "OS Resolution") burglar alarm, Bristol • Aha - I love a sticker, and especially a violent yellow one. Bristol seems to have a particularly thriving burglar alarm ecosystem, and here, ASG Vision have effected a brutal takeover of a hapless OS Resolution box (both firms I have come across this one time only). It's included due to the "vision" reference; what the acronym ASG refers to remains opaque, but I reckon its flamboyant tail is a very abstract eye. • Spotted: Broad Street, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol West
“IFSS Infocus Security”, Hounslow: verbal vision
"IFSS Infocus Security" burglar alarm, Hounslow • Now I leave the visual representation of eyes for a few alarms that, counterintuitively, refer to vision verbally – in this case, with that popular catch-all management-speak buzz-word, "focus". In all other ways, it's a supremely boring design – it isn't even an unexplained acronym, despite the extra "S" (for "systems", presumably). I promise there are some better ones to come. • Spotted: Chiswick Mall, Hounslow, London, W4, England, 2006 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Brentford and Isleworth
“Focus Security Systems”, Bristol: dying star
"Focus Security Systems" burglar alarm, Bristol • The inclusion of the word "Focus" on this faded device leads me to think of this as a stylised eye, though it could equally be a dying star. Focus don't appear to have a website, and when I looked them up on Google Street View it showed a caravan... so that may be an apt metaphor. • Spotted: Town centre, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2006 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol West
“Metro Security Centre”, Tower Hamlets: wide eyed
"Metro Security Centre" burglar alarm, Tower Hamlets • I'm probably reading too much into this design, but I see it as one immense red eye with a staring black pupil, hence its inclusion within the "vision" theme. Although that would only work on sounders of this specific almost-eye shape, and most firms use a variety of box styles over the years, so I'm probably wrong. • Spotted: Redchurch Street, Tower Hamlets, London, E2, England, 2007 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Bethnal Green and Bow
“Raysil”, Southwark: snorey update
"Raysil Security Systems Ltd" burglar alarm, Southwark • Here we have a more recent and less faded version of yesterday's Raysil alarm, sporting the same dodgy design on a lovely new hexagonal box. In other words, a snorey update included for the sake of completeness. • Spotted: Farnham Place, Southwark, London, SE1, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bermondsey and Old Southwark
“Raysil”, Birchington-on-Sea: sci-fi Clearasil
"Raysil Security Systems Ltd" burglar alarm, Birchington-on-Sea • Once again an abstract eye stares out from a diamond-shaped panel, this one less elegant than yesterday's and possibly constructed from a clunky mutated R and Y. Raysil, reminiscent of Clearasil, is an odd name. The word "ray' is always quite sci-fi-sounding, and it's set in what in lesser graphic design circles of the 1980s would have passed for a sci-fi typeface. But I'm wondering if, more prosaically, it's made of two names run together: Ray and Silvia, for instance, or Ray Silver (though my researches show the erstwhile owners, who sold out to a venture capital company in 2008, are not called anything like that). As an aside, can I point out that this hefty, angular sounder is surely one of the ugliest "jewel-shaped" (aka delta) boxes ever made. • Spotted: Town centre, Birchington-on-Sea, Kent, CT7, England, 2006 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Thanet North
“Octagon”, Marlborough: one-sided
"Octagon" burglar alarm, Marlborough • An abstract octagonal eye for a company called Octagon, in a circular sounder. I bet they'd have liked an octagonal one, but to my knowledge such things don't exist. (There's an eight-sided box as sported by the Next Gen alarm at top left here, but being irregular it looks nothing like a classic octagon.) • Spotted: Town centre, Marlborough, Wiltshire, SN8, England, 2007 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Devizes
“Intelligent Security Installations”, Eton: untutored
"Intelligent Security Installations" burglar alarm, Eton • Despite the lack of pupils, I reckon those are peepers dotting the "i"s with their blank-eyed stare, although the design – unlike pupils at nearby Eton – is most kindly described as "untutored". Just as well they spell out the firm's name underneath, or the meaning would remain totally obscure. • Spotted: High Street, Eton, Berkshire, SL4, England, 2009 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Windsor
“Panther Security”, East Grinstead: mutant eyebrow
"Panther Security" burglar alarm, East Grinstead • For years I didn't spot the "P" in the eye here, and was racking my brains as to what the full word could be – "ANTHEM" was my best (and wrong) guess. Then recently I came across this more recent version: lo and behold there was a letter “P” in the eye, so the firm is of course Panther. Although real panthers don't have eyebrows. • Spotted: London Road, East Grinstead, West Sussex, RH19, England, 2004 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Sussex Mid
“Crism”, Sheffield: concrete poetry
"Crism" burglar alarm, Sheffield • A piece of concrete poetry, no less. I haven't got a subscription to the OED (never thought a burglar alarm blog would necessitate one), so can't check if it's a real word – but I suspect it isn't. And even if it was, in Scrabble it would only get you a weedy 9 points. To continue the poetry theme, the only rhymes are "prism" (from which it is doubtless derived) and "schism", so it's probably pronounced "Krizzum", though I'm not stalkerish enough to ring them and see how they say it when they answer the phone. I guessed it was a firm run by someone called Chris M, and checking their website find this is indeed the case. Which would surely be "ChrisM" (note the upper-case M, and being one letter away from "Christ"), but perhaps that's a bit too avant-garde, even for Sheffield. • Spotted: Campo Lane, Sheffield, South Yorkshire, S1, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Sheffield Central
“BAC”, Bristol: uninspired iris
"BAC" burglar alarm, Bristol • I like burglar alarm-hunting in the West Country, because there are so many independent firms with quirky designs. Sadly, this is one of the less inspired ones: I'm not sure if it's a letter "O" representing the iris (or perhaps a number "0", for zero crime), but I'm including it in the typographic section anyway. There's an example of BAC's current design here, which is even worse, and doesn't look like an eye any more. The firm is based in the unpreposessing yet quaintly-named suburb of Fishponds; their website gives no clue as to what BAC stands for, but I'm guessing Bristol Alarm Company. • Spotted: Exchange Avenue, St Nicholas Market, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol West
“Euroscan Security”, East Grinstead: plucky move
"Euroscan Security Ltd" burglar alarm, East Grinstead• Now, in the never-ending procession of eyes, I move on to typographic treatments. This one is quite clever, though invoking the continent is a plucky move in this swathe of deeply traditional stockbroker belt, which is represented in parliament by Tory grandee Nicholas Soames, the portly grandson of Winston Churchill. And referencing the Euro isn't exactly reassuring to anyone these days. • Spotted: Middle Row, East Grinstead, West Sussex, RH19, England, 2004 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Sussex Mid
“Argus Always Alert”, Westminster: retro gem
"Argus Always Alert" burglar alarm, City of Westminster • So I was standing waiting for the bus near Victoria Station, as one does, when I looked up and saw this: a superb vintage Argus alarm, with an abstract eye in the "g", and the enjoyable tagline "always alert". It's much nicer than the more recent red-and-black Argus Fire & Security Group alarm I found here, though I presume it's the same company. The building it's on is also a retro gem: Kingsgate House (pictured below), an attractive marble-fronted 1960s office block which is about to be swept away in a massive redevelopment, along with its all-seeing, hundred-eyed, always-alert guardian. • Spotted: Kingsgate House, Victoria Street, City of Westminster, London, SW1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Cities of London and Westminster
Above: Kingsgate House, Victoria – not long for this world“Vigilance Security”, Tower Hamlets: deeply dull
"Vigilance Security Systems Ltd" burglar alarm, Tower Hamlets • A deeply dull design, included only because there's a faint, pinky-mauve eye on it – squint hard, and you'll see it behind the "V" of Vigilance. If you don't fall asleep first. • Spotted: Bethnal Green Road, Tower Hamlets, London, E2, England, 2005 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Bethnal Green and Bow
“Securidor”, Islington: bilious egg
"Securidor Total Security Systems" burglar alarm, Islington • A pun on Securi-door, presumably, in a font by famous graphic designer Neville Brody (an unlikely hit with burglar alarm designers), above a bilious, badly-drawn eye that looks more like half a fried egg. It's nice to know Securidor offer total (as opposed to what – partial?) security, but the nit-picking grammar police will be on their tail for that wrongly-spaced phone code – it should be 020 8 blah blah blah. • Spotted: Wedmore Gardens, Islington, London, N19, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Islington North
“TecServ UK”, Nottingham: Freudian epic
"TecServ UK" burglar alarm, Nottingham • Dull though it may appear to the untrained eye, to the expert burglar alarm analyst this small device is a Daily Mail-esque Freudian epic. Clad in royal blue and English mustard with a modern yet understated font, it mixes trendy with traditional in a riot of symbolism: a padlock within a passionately flaming eye, a name suggesting service, technical prowess and patriotic values, and a sub-offer of fieriness and security. Surely the very model of a Femail reader's fantasy burglar alarm engineer – a Heathcliff of the sounder, a Mr Darcy of the bell box. Or perhaps I'm reading too much into it. • Spotted: Friar Lane, Nottingham, Nottinghamshire, NG1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Nottingham South
“Case Alarms”, Islington: manga face
"Case Alarms" burglar alarm, Islington • If you ignore the logo, this looks like a weird Japanese manga face with a single red eye and a gaping blue mouth with one red tooth. Well, it does to me... • Spotted: Caledonian Road, Islington, London, N7, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Islington South and Finsbury
“Image Security”, Westminster: unattracive pupil
"Image Security" burglar alarm, City of Westminster • Continuing the theme of abstract eyes is this more literal – and far less distinguished – take on the "red warning eye" as featured by Barry Bros yesterday. Note the red strobe, which is far more common than the unusual green one featured a few days ago on this Spy alarm. • Spotted: Great Titchfield Street, City of Westminster, London, W1, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Cities of London and Westminster
“Barry Bros”, Westminster: red eye
"Barry Bros" burglar alarm, City of Westminster • An even older Barry Bros alarm than yesterday's, this time with a big red eye and an ancient 071 code, plus a much bigger box. I prefer this red eye to the newer blue ones, because it looks like a warning light. Thankfully this is the last Barry Bros box, as there's not much else to say about them. • Spotted: Lower Marsh, Lambeth, London, SE1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Vauxhall
“Barry Bros”, Camden: back to the 90s
"Barry Bros" burglar alarm, Camden • This is a slightly older version of yesterday's Barry Bros design, minus the word "security" and with an outmoded 0171 code – very 1990s. The actual sounder is of the same style as yesterday, with the slim square bulb beneath; it's quite a common type, though I haven't featured many so far. Other than that there is nothing scintillating to note – I am simply being completist about sounders with eyes on. • Spotted: Covent Garden area, Camden, London, WC2, England, 2004 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Holborn and St Pancras
“Barry Bros Security”, Westminster: abstract eye
"Barry Bros Security" burglar alarm, City of Westminster • This is quite a popular firm in central London, and I have come across several versions of their abstract eye design. This is the most recent-looking, although dating back to 2002; it bears the magic word "security", whereas the older ones don't. Barry Bros' rather antiquated website says they were founded in 1945 and are based in Praed Street WC1, opposite Paddington Station; Google Street View shows them as still there, so presumably they still exist. • Spotted: Mortimer Street, City of Westminster, London, W1, England, 2002 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Cities of London and Westminster
“Spy Alarms”, Tower Hamlets: giant mascara
"Spy Alarms" burglar alarm, Tower Hamlets • My final Spy alarm is the only example of this logo I've found – which I reckon is a more recent design than yesterday's, though the eye still sports giant mascara. The green strobe at the bottom is unusual (most seem to be blue), and was presumably chosen to match the lettering. • Spotted: Fairfield Road, Tower Hamlets, London, E3, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Bethnal Green and Bow
“Spy Alarms”, Westminster: sitting on fossils
"Spy Alarms" burglar alarm, City of Westminster • Here's a more recent iteration of the Spy design than yesterday's, a strange and decorative Egyptian-looking eye which is either crying, emitting rays, or has very effective mascara. It's sited on a strip of marble teeming with the fossils of ancient sea creatures – which is a lot more interesting than the burglar alarm, really. • Spotted: Strutton Ground, City of Westminster, London, SW1, England, 2007 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Cities of London and Westminster
Above: a better view of the fossil marble strip“Spy Alarms”, Lewisham: not cyclops
"Spy Alarms" burglar alarm, Lewisham • Why do all these designs only have one eye? Here's another cyclops, the Masonic-looking Spy, on a sounder so old it's got an 081 London number. Actually, I've just noticed there's another little eye in the "P", so it's not a cyclops after all; but it's still really weird. • Spotted: Lewisham High Street, Lewisham, London, SE13, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Lewisham Deptford
“APS”, Bristol: tangled metaphor
"APS" burglar alarm, Bristol • A tangled visual metaphor, for sure: a one-eyed arrow-shaped house, with another arrow for a nose, joined by a dotted line (or a very ill-advised facial tattoo) to some soundwaves coming from its single ear, which presumably represents this sounder. The typography is equally complex, with four different fonts, and even the box is an unusual shape and colour – the few other examples I've found have blue sides, whereas these are green. It's all very neatly laid out, and gives the impression that every detail was agonised over – all told, a most unusual sounder design. • Spotted: Corn Street, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol West
“Alarm Systems Torquay”, Bath: hydrant sign
"Alarm Systems Torquay" burglar alarm, Bath • This looks like the miniaturised eye from yesterday's odd alarm, staring out from one of those yellow H signs signifying a fire hydrant (see below). It could be a black magic symbol, but it's more likely to be a monogram – saying H, OH, HI or even OHI – but with a sounder this old there's no info to be found. • Spotted: George Street, Bath, Avon, BA1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bath
Above: a fire hydrant sign (photo by Bishty)“SM”, Bristol: strange peeper
"SM" burglar alarm, Bristol • A blank-faced box with a single black peeper – this is just strange, and like so many sounders featuring eyes, a bit creepy. The company's name is totally obscure – I'm not even sure if it's ISM (geddit), OSM, or just SM, and of course there's no clue what any of it stands for. It's probably not Sado-Masochist, so I'm guessing Security Master. • Spotted: High Street, Bristol, Avon, BS1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bristol West
“Enright Security”, Southwark: futuristic
"Enright Security" burglar alarm, Southwark • I've already shown a small version of this as part of a decaying duo on an old laundry, so here it is in close-up: a superb vintage sounder with a sci-fi eye pierced by a lightning flash. Mike Hardesty, whose company it was, explains in his interesting comments here that the firm was started in 1976, named after his partner Eddy Enright, and sold to Lander Alarms in 1982. The logo was meant to represent an electronic eye, and was designed by a customer from his previous company who was "a bit of an arty person". I bet he never thought it would turn up on a futuristic invention called "the internet" over 30 years later. • Spotted: Pages Walk, Southwark, London, SE1, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Liberal Democrat constituency of Bermondsey and Old Southwark
“Wakefield Security & Fire”, Shoreham-by-Sea: surreal
"Wakefield Security & Fire" burglar alarm, Shoreham-by-Sea • A while ago I published an old Wakefield alarm with unfair accusations of sleepiness – so here's a more up-to-date example, which is very wakeful indeed. It's also one of only a four sounders I have found decorated with photographic images, the others being two birds and a chain. This looks like something out of a surrealist film, and is almost as unnerving as yesterday's creepy eye sticker. The firm's proprietor, in a comment below, explains that there's also a globe reflected in the eye's iris, though sadly it's not visible in this photo. • Spotted: Town centre, Shoreham-by-Sea, West Sussex, BN43, England, 2005 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Worthing West
Eye sticker, Westminster: creepy graffiti
Nameless burglar alarm with eye sticker, City of Westminster • Ushering in the theme of "vision", which for obvious reasons is one of the most popular burglar alarm tropes, is this rather disturbing example of sticker graffiti. The creepy intervention lurks next to an art gallery (Haunch of Venison, named after the yard it's in) – probably no coincidence. I've discovered the sticker is by a street artist called Paul Insect – a print of a similar image would set you back nearly £700, as you can see here at Opus Art. • Spotted: Haunch of Venison Yard, City of Westminster, London, W1, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Cities of London and Westminster
“Panther security.co.uk”, Reigate: Countdown
"Panther security.co.uk" burglar alarm, Reigate • Not quite as impressive a design as yesterday's stencilled panther, though it does fall into the popular category of "vision", which I have yet to explore on this blog. For years I had a photo of a rectangular version of this alarm reading "ANTHER", because the left side was obscured; I couldn't work out what the name meant, and it only recently dawned on me that there was a letter "P" in the eye, and so the full word must be Panther. Then the other month I stumbled across this, proving myself correct. But clearly I would be crap on Countdown. • Spotted: High Street, Reigate, Surrey, RH2, England, 2011 • Politics: In the Conservative constituency of Reigate
“Spy Alarms”, Lambeth: a creepy Masonic sign?
"Spy Alarms" burglar alarm, Lambeth • Once upon a time, a proud Lower Marsh retailer had this burglar alarm smartly fitted into a niche in their shop sign. Such was their attention to detail, that before the Spy label was stuck on, they even had the alarm's case painted dark blue to match the fascia. Then along came the sun, the wind and the rain – and off started to peel the Spy label, because it didn't stick to the paint properly. The result is a scarily blank crying / beaming Egyptian-style eye above a decaying paranoiac logo, peeking creepily out of its hole like a weird old sign for some defunct Masonic lodge. (Although Lower Marsh is so odd it wouldn't surprise me if there actually was a Masonic lodge there.) • Spotted: Lower Marsh, Lambeth, London, SE1, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Vauxhall
“JB-Eye”, Manchester: Pacman eats burglar
"JB-Eye Security Systems" burglar alarm, Manchester, 2009 • "Please, Mr Pacman, don't eat me! I don't want to be a topping on your giant cheese pizza!" This looks like a tiny, pleading figure imploring a monster Pacman not to devour him. The unusual refinement of a shadow suggests a blast of nuclear light emanating from the chomping black blob. What the title JB-Eye has to do with it all is opaque – the name of some weird Pacman religion perhaps? • Spotted: Deansgate area, Manchester, Lancashire, M1, England, 2009 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of Manchester Central
“Watchdog”, Newham: the Cyclops of Olympic Park
"Watchdog" burglar alarm, Newham, 2010 • As if the gazillions of CCTV cameras watching us weren't enough, now we've got burglar alarms with eyes too. And despite being on public land, I was heavily hassled by a bunch of G4 "security operatives" simply for snapping the one here. That's because it's in an area where most alarms – along with the rotting industrial buildings they were attached to – have been swept away to make way for London's glossy new Olympic Park. I was once terrorized by a monstrous, crazed watchdog while exploring the Olympics area pre-demolition, and to me, this device resembles a blue-nosed dog with one mean, narrowed eye: the face of a wary Staffie with its ears flattened back, ready for combat. If the designer intended this, by the placing of the logo in relation to the snubby bulb below, then it's deceptively clever; it makes me think of the plastic debris masks by African artist Romuald Hazoumé. It's an all-seeing cyclops of the Olympics, a one-eyed Cerberus of the Bow Back Rivers. Or maybe that's just my bad memories kicking in. • Spotted: Marshgate Lane, Newham, London E15, England, 2010 • Politics: In the Labour constituency of West Ham
